1. Water/Gatorade
It's important to stay hydrated on the road and it is even more important to choose the right drinks. Be sure to have a gallon of water, they cost 40 cents and will serve as your personal well. In addition to water you should also have a bottle of gatorade on hand. Gatorade is a great way for the passengers to conceal the vodka they're drinking. Be sure to get the bottle with the biggest mouth opening. Whatever you do, do not drink soda. Soda will make you want to pee fast and often. If you don't listen to me and drink soda anyway that's alright because we saved the empty gatorade bottle. There's a reason you want to get the bottle with the widest opening and you know what that is.2. CD's
One of the joys of being on the road is going back to basics. Ipod's have a battery life. You know what doesn't? CD's. Nothing worse than driving with nothing to jam too. Plan ahead and make some tasty playlists.
3. Road Atlas/Maps
In keeping with the theme of going back to basics it is important to have an actual map in the car. It's in our DNA as men to not ask for directions and as far as I'm concerned using GPS or an Iphone is asking for directions. Don't be a girl, man up, and know what you're doing and where you're going.
4. Roadside Assistance Kit
You know what's also for girls? Triple A. Odd's are at some point in your travels you are going to get a flat tire. If you do not know how to change the tire on your own car you should not be driving at all. A roadside assistance kit can come in handy when you are in jam. Be sure to have road flares, a flashlight (with fresh batteries), jumper cables, duct tape, and a screw driver. You'd be surprised how much these items can help you out.5. Back-up pare of shades
I don't need to tell you that sunglasses are a must for a road trip, you already know that. What you might not know is that you need a back-up pair that are as ready to step up as Tarvaris Jackson is on Sunday's. Shit happens and sunglasses are fragile. Carrying an extra pare is vital.
6. A Towel
Are you aware of how many things you can use a towel for? Spill a drink, boom towel. Have a urinating mishap, boom towel. Need a pillow to catch some Z's, boom towel. Want to take a quick shower on the side of the road with your gallon of water, boom towel. I can keep going, but I think you get the point.
7. Tobacco
Pick your poison (get it?). Cigarettes, chewing tobacco, dip, snus...whatever your heart desires. Tobacco provides that perfect buzz you need for a long drive.
8. Open Mind
Probably the most important item on this list. The best part of a road trip is the adventure and the unknown. See a bonsai tree stand, you better stop or I'll kick your ass. Strolling through Mark Twain's hometown you bet I'm stopping by his house. Spot a hitchhiker carrying an axe, why not pick him up and see what happens. Also don't forget to keep your shred stick in the trunk, you never know when you'll stumble across a skate spot. The open road is a wonderful mistress, now get out there and get some!
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